Friday, September 7, 2012

Send Love and Light!

Recently I have been on this beautiful journey of steadily reading Elizabeth Gilbert's Eat, Pray, Love. Anyone who knows me knows that this book has definitely been influencing my outlook on life. (What can I say, I'm a sucker for self-reflection and self-discovery!) One concept from this book that I have been trying to cultivate in my own life is the idea of sending peace and kindness over someone's way.

Now, to be specific, the author writes that her friend Richard from Texas advised that she "send him some light and love" whenever she thought of her ex. I won't spoil the story, but I'll tell you that basically he was teaching her how to let go of a negative situation. And, somehow, someway, in my mind, this entire scene (Yes, I watched the movie first, 'tis true, but I'm actually reading it now, okay!) took on this whole new meaning of sending love and light (or peacefulness?) towards anyone who has annoyed or wronged you in the past.

You can think of it as sending positive vibes towards someone. You can even think of it as doing the opposite of holding a grudge. Instead of staying angry at someone who has upset you or holding on to that terrible feeling of resentment, why not release those negative energies and replace it by sending loving kindness their way? I love this idea, and I strongly believe it's one worth practicing.

I credit the book for bringing this idea to the forefront of my mind, but I'd be remiss if I didn't mention another medium through which I learned about this concept of loving kindness. In the Psychology of Mindfulness course I took while in undergrad, we discussed a variety of concepts that quite simply nourish the soul. The Loving Kindness Meditation was one of them. In this practice, you are encouraged to send loving kindness by saying a set of pleasant phrases like, "May you be happy" over and over again to yourself, to your friends, to your enemies and to all of humanity. I'm paraphrasing, of course, and I encourage anyone in their spare time to read the actual article by Marcello Spinella, Ph.D. in order to truly appreciate and understand the concept and the practice. It's amazing what healthful benefits can come from simply wishing someone, anyone, well.

So, nowadays, whenever someone or something annoys or irks me, I try to think fondly of that situation or that person. I try not to go down the train of thought that's like, "How do I loathe thee? Let me count the ways". That's a sure way to make you feel worse, I think. Yet, I don't pretend like the situation didn't upset me. Rather, I try to look at the situation for what it is in the big scheme of things - one incident out of a billion occurrences in life. Then, I try to remember certain qualities of that person that I do appreciate or admire. Believe me, it's a lot less stressful to think of happy, lighthearted qualities, rather than the heavy, negative ones that upset you in the first place.

So, like, I said, this is a practice, meaning, I don't expect to always feel so calm and peaceful towards a difficult situation or person. But, when it comes down to it, I would rather practice feeling calm and peaceful as much as I can. So, whatever your deal is or will be, cultivate and reap love and light for yourself, others and everyone else! Because, well, why not, right?

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